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Vampire

5/10
Drama . Horror . Thriller
 

A vampire, who works as a teacher, searches for suicidal female students and seduces them prior to sucking their blood.

 
Actors: Kevin Zegers , Keisha Castle-Hughes , Amanda Plummer , Trevor Morgan , Kristin Kreuk , Adelaide Clemens , Yu Aoi , Rachael Leigh Cook , Jodi Balfour , Ian Brown
Directors: Shunji Iwai
Country: USA , JAPAN
Release: 2011-01-22
More Info:
  • Joe Williams

    A blast, the best action movie of the summer.

    St. Louis Post-Dispatch Full Review
  • Shawn Levy

    When Bekmambetov is in full stride and the gore, oaths and silver bullets are flying, it's a kick. The title may sound like a joke, but Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is serious fun.

    Portland Oregonian Full Review
  • Marc Savlov

    Benjamin Walker, as Lincoln, may not have the gangly gravitas of Raymond Massey's "Abe Lincoln in Illinois" – he looks like a young Liam Neeson doing a younger Bruce Campbell, frankly – but he does have a sly, self-effacing sense of humor that feels ever so Lincoln-esque

    Austin Chronicle Full Review
  • Mick LaSalle

    Instead of getting smirky and campy and blowing out the joke in the first few scenes, Grahame-Smith and director Timur Bekmambetov straight-face it. They ask themselves, well, what would it be like if the main struggle of Lincoln's life were with vampires intent on taking over the new world? And they answer the question as realistically and soberly as they can within this loony framework.

    San Francisco Chronicle Full Review
  • Roger Ebert

    Without a doubt the best film we are ever likely to see on the subject - unless there is a sequel, which is unlikely, because at the end, the Lincolns are on their way to the theater.

    Chicago Sun-Times Full Review
  • Andrew O'Hehir

    There's definitely some empty-calories, summer-movie fun to be found in this ludicrous genre mashup, most of it courtesy of maniacal Russian director Timur Bekmambetov, who stages hilarious, imaginative, almost free-form action sequences like nobody in the business.

    Salon.com Full Review
  • Justin Lowe

    Genre enthusiasts will lap up the mixture of action and fantasy, while history buffs who don't mind a bit of rewriting will dig into an alternative spin on the Civil War period.

    The Hollywood Reporter Full Review
  • Justin Chang

    A Civil War-era actioner of questionable taste and historical accuracy but surprisingly consistent entertainment value.

    Variety Full Review
  • Scott Bowles

    A stylish slasher of a movie, a monster flick that does its vampires right, if not their real-life counterparts.

    USA Today Full Review
  • Michael O'Sullivan

    Both terribly silly and a lot of fun.

    Washington Post Full Review
  • James Berardinelli

    One expects a movie called Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter to be rich in wit and black humor, but writer Seth Grahame-Smith and director Timur Bekmambetov opt to play things reasonably straight.

    ReelViews Full Review
  • Nick Schager

    The script leaps forward with an absurdity almost as great as Lincoln's own strength.

    Slant Magazine Full Review
  • Peter Bradshaw

    Bekmambetov directs with gusto, and the forthright absurdity of the story, combined with its weirdly heartfelt self-belief is winning.

    The Guardian Full Review
  • Lisa Schwarzbaum

    With so much flesh crunching and bloodletting, it could have been scary as all Walking Dead get-out. Instead, the movie plays safe by cutting every theme down the middle - a swing that's effective when splitting wood or vampire skulls, but dull when applied to filmmaking.

    Entertainment Weekly Full Review
  • Kate Erbland

    It's not nearly as snappy or campy as it should be-though its self-seriousness is its own kind of entertainment.

    Boxoffice Magazine Full Review
  • Michael Phillips

    It sounds fun. It's a little fun. For a while. But Bekmanbetov shoots every killing spree like an addled gamer, working that slow-down-speed-up kill-shot cliche like a maniac.

    Chicago Tribune Full Review
  • Tasha Robinson

    The training montage where Lincoln learns to twirl his axe around his body like a baton for no apparent purpose is neither the movie's first laughable sequence nor its last, but it sums up the movie's aesthetic: The filmmakers mistakenly think nothing is silly if it's done with a grim enough facial expression.

    The A.V. Club Full Review
  • Stephanie Zacharek

    It doesn't take long for Bekmambetov to wear out his welcome with a laundry list of generic-looking action sequences: When you've seen one vampire get stabbed in the eyeball, you've seen 'em all.

    Movieline Full Review
  • Bilge Ebiri

    Unfortunately, there's also a certain artificiality to the whole film, both visually and narratively.

    New York Magazine (Vulture) Full Review
  • Manohla Dargis

    Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is such a smashing title it's too bad someone had to spoil things by making a movie to go with it.

    The New York Times Full Review
  • Kenneth Turan

    Given the subject matter, an exercise in delicacy and restraint was unlikely, but it's too bad that the film's concept is way more entertaining than what has ended up on-screen.

    Los Angeles Times Full Review
  • Dan Jolin

    The grave tone makes it stiff and leaden, the digi-saturated look is a turn-off. Damnable and disordered.

    Empire Full Review
  • Barbara VanDenburgh

    The problem with movies based on a single joke is that a single joke is rarely funny enough to sustain the running time of a feature-length film. And with Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, the whole joke is in the title.

    Arizona Republic Full Review
  • Richard Corliss

    Watching this is like flipping channels randomly between a Masterpiece Theatre drama and a splatter film on Cinemax. If you're like me, you'll stick with the splatter.

    Time Full Review
  • Nick Pinkerton

    Possible resulting "fun" is only slightly mitigated by contemplation of the wearisome decadence of American popular culture.

    Village Voice Full Review
  • Neil Smith

    What [Bekmambetov] doesn't do is offer us any respite from his 3D CGI barrage, an assault on the senses that makes the bullet John Wilkes Booth fired into the real Abe's noggin seem calming by comparison.

    Total Film Full Review
  • James Adams

    The biggest high comes from the images evoked by the title alone, or the title in tandem with the movie poster, doesn't it?

    The Globe and Mail (Toronto) Full Review
  • Peter Travers

    The movie deserves a stake through the heart.

    Rolling Stone Full Review
  • Ty Burr

    A pox upon history and an insult to the 16th president of the United States. It's that, of course - actually, that's the point - but this joyless, deafening cinematic headache commits a different crime. It's a sin against entertainment.

    Boston Globe Full Review
  • Steve Persall

    Other than its campy title, not much about Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is fun.

    Tampa Bay Times Full Review
  • Rene Rodriguez

    Enormous in its scope and colossal in its stupidity.

    Miami Herald Full Review
  • Joe Morgenstern

    What I don't understand is why this extended piece of idiocy chose to sink its stinky teeth into our 16th president. If an axe-wielding hero was required, George Washington would have been the better choice, with the Redcoats as bloodsuckers.

    Wall Street Journal Full Review
  • Keith Uhlich

    This ludicrous CGI extravaganza, based on the comic horror novel by Seth Grahame-Smith, can stand proudly beside the best-worst of Ed Wood and Uwe Boll.

    Time Out New York Full Review
  • Joe Neumaier

    This insipid mashup of history lesson and monster flick takes itself semi-seriously, which is truly deadly.

    New York Daily News Full Review
  • Kyle Smith

    I didn't know whether to be more offended as a moviegoer or as an American, but I do know I'd rather gargle nitroglycerine than watch this again, though given that the film looks like it were buried under a log cabin for a century, I barely saw it the first time.

    New York Post Full Review
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  • suicide

  • vampire

  • teacher

  • blood

  • biology teacher

  • breasts

  • death

  • murder of a nude woman

  • suicidal woman

  • mother son relationship

  • plastic bag over head

  • asphyxiation

  • dead woman with eyes open

  • group suicide

  • poison gas

  • dead woman

  • suicide pact

  • flashback

  • nurse

  • blood donation

  • exchange student

  • alzheimer's disease

  • breaking and entering

  • piano

  • computer

  • science teacher

  • taxi

  • balloon

  • rape

  • murder

  • freezer

  • corpse

  • suicidal thoughts

  • leech

  • one word title

  • title spoken by character

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